5th day of the Tenth Passange Hand in the Year 10,157 CA

I have been a bit lax in adding new details here in my journal, but I hope to make up for them. Besides working at my shop, I have been introducing Xan to other people of my city, during the Harbor Festival. They seem to like her sense of humor the way I do. Its so abrupt coming from such a cultured, refined woman, and so sarcastic...rather like my own humor. I find that we have many things in common. Since the night of the fishing tournament, I have spoken to my mother about Xan, and my feelings for her. Lady Cameron said I needed to follow my heart, and so must I. Journal, I plan on asking her to become my free companion. I don't know how yet or what method would be best for asking her to companion me. This my mother left up to me. We spent days getting to know each other, and then one morning on the terrace, I doted on her, noticing her knack of sketching from the fishing tournament. I surprised Xan with an artist's easel, canvasses, oil paints and brushes and colored writing sticks for more expressionable sketches than black and white only. We shared in that moment, and she surprised me by removing her thin veil, to become more like the women of Schendi. I saw her face, smooth blushing cheekbones, full ripe lips, aquiline nose and those starry silver depths of hers. Looking into her eyes is like gazing at a night sky. I dream about her at night, all my thoughts seem to drift to her wherever I am. Especially this. The way she hugged me tight when I gave her the presents and she opened them, and I whispered, nakupenda (my love). Of course I had to translate it for her, but I feel we came to the crossroads of our relationship where there was no turning back. I finally admitted my feelings for her, heart and soul. She said she felt the same way about me, and my heart sang. Never will I forget that moment on the terrace, I felt as if I had made an offering of my heart, and it had been accepted. I don't know where I'd be today without her by my side. I probably would have given up on love entirely had it not been for the Priest Kings sending Xan to me. And I will always be grateful for the gift of her.